The first time someone snidely told me to be sure to post pictures of all the useless crap I got for Christmas, it was because they didn’t have enough money to buy anything and they were taking it out on me. I was quite hurt but, I let it go.
The next time someone spat “Enjoy all your useless shit!” at me, it was because they didn’t like their presents. They felt they were entitled to more.
The last time someone said that “at least you had a Christmas” in a rude tone…
You know what. Fuck all of you. Let me tell you about my Christmas. First, the list of useless crap I got for Christmas.
1. A purple RCA Voyager 7 touchpad from my ex. Thank you ML.
2. A bottle of Rumpleminze from Dad and Mom. Thank you, Dad and Mom!
Yep, that was it. While it may seem small to some, others are throwing it in my face because at least I got presents.
Okay, now guess what I bought my children, you petty little bitches. Go ahead. Guess. I will wait while you take a guess.
Answer: Not a damned thing.
I have no income, so I can’t afford to buy any Christmas presents for my kids. The only presents they got were from my parents and from their dad. In fact, if it weren’t for their dad and my dad, we wouldn’t have had a much of a Christmas.
Because I am broke doesn’t mean that I couldn’t DO something for my kids though.
Together, we made a “fancy” meal. Read as “something other than lentils and rice”. We had bison, chicken, homemade mac and cheese, biscuits, broccoli, carrots, and some other foods. While I did not make the whole meal, I helped and I made the mac and cheese (my specialty).
After we ate, we watched a movie together and played games. I found an ocean monument in Minecraft! It felt like a special day, even though I could not give my kids gifts. It was still a special day because we went to my parents to exchange gifts. And by that, I mean, I gave my parents a bottle of whiskey that my ex paid for, and I got a bottle of Rumpleminze. I needed it too.
It was a special day despite the few gifts because I did something special with my family. I got to spend the entire day with them.
I am pretty hurt that people can be so petty and nasty just because my family made sure we had presents and a nice day despite the fact that the rest of the year we fucking starve and have nothing to look forward to.
It made me feel so loved that my kids took the time to help me set up the tree and then prop it up vicariously with random heavy objects from around the house. Why? Because we can’t afford a nice tree. No. Ours is a hand me down that is missing half the legs and doesn’t stand on its own.
In fact, we didn’t decorate our tree at all this year for fear that all the ornaments would break when it fell over. Not IF it fell over, but WHEN it fell over. It fell a lot. But it had lights and made the apartment feel a little festive.
I needed that too. Even though we are poor, more poor than I have ever been, I don’t take it out on everyone else. I don’t hurl insults at people who can pay their rent each month. I am just grateful I am not homeless yet.
And this is why I hate the holiday season. Because even when I cannot afford anything, I become the verbal whipping boy for the poor community.
I am sick of it. If you think you can’t have Christmas without presents, then you are what is wrong with this holiday.