50 Questions: What do you want to be when you grow up?

Today’s 50 question is number 38.

“What do you want to be when you grow up? (Yes, there is still time!)

I thought I would answer this a wee bit different from just “I wanna be a writer!” I am listing what I wanted to be throughout my life.

Here are my top six of things I wanted to be (and why I didn’t become that).

What I wanted to be #1: A Bird

When I was in Kindergarten I wanted to be a bird.

Photo Credit: holyknight33 (is gone! too busy! sorry guys!) via StoolsFair / CC BY-NC

Specifically, I wanted to be a RED bird. For some reason, I didn’t realize that you stayed human through your whole life. I wanted to be able to fly. 

What happened? I stayed human. I know. That’s so anticlimactic. It would be cooler if I had turned into a lizard or a polar bear instead. That would make blogging a lot harder though.

What I wanted to be #2: A Teacher

Then came along the desire to be a teacher. I had dreams of being the best teacher EVER! I was going to be just like Mrs. Beaulafont, my third grade teacher.

What happened? As I got older, I realized that I like children, just not that much. I also get migraines easily with a lot of noise. I don’t want to be near them 8+ hours a day 5 days a week, 10 months out of the year. (School here starts August 31st and gets out June 9th). 

Plus, I realized that my idea of education and teaching varies greatly from the public school system’s idea of education and teaching. I would probably be fired by the end of year one.

What I wanted to be #3: Race Car Driver!

Yes, at one point in my life I wanted to be a race car driver. I wanted to feel the thrill of driving at stupidly high speeds and enjoy the exhilaration and rush of the sport.

Photo credit: pedrosimoes7 via Foter.com / CC BY

What happened? When I was 18 years old, I was in a pretty bad accident that totaled my 1967 Plymouth Valiant. That thing was built like a tank.

I realized that if a car accident at 55 mph could total the Green Beast, I would probably die if I crashed a glorified aluminum can, even if it did have a reinforced roll cage in it.

What I wanted to be #4: A Nun

Oh how I dreamed of living in a cool cathedral style church, gardening, singing, praising God, and doing all the other cool Nun things.

Photo credit: zoonabar via Foter.com / CC BY

What happened? I learned that you have to be Catholic to be a Nun. I am not, nor have I ever been, Catholic.

What I wanted to be #5: A Rodeo Clown

Yes, at one point in my life I wanted to be a rodeo clown because it combined rodeos (which I loved) and clowning (which I also loved) into one really cool job!

What happened? Common sense and self-preservation kicked in. I realized what could happen.

WARNING: Link is probably NSFW/ NSFL and you probably should not open it if you are squeamish. Why I am not a rodeo clown.

What I wanted to be #6: A Doctor or a Nurse or a Nurse Practitioner

Wouldn’t that be cool though? Helping people and saving lives would be the highlight of that career. Getting to know people would be cool too. Just making a difference in people’s lives would outweigh the bad things of the job. Right?

I did become a Certified Nurse Assistant and had a plan of working up to becoming a Physicians Assistant or Nurse Practitioner. 

Photo credit: DES Daughter via Foter.com / CC BY-NC-SA

What happened? Well… first off, I can’t afford to go to college. My credit sucks so hard it could suck the yoke out an egg through a pinhole so, loans are out.

I had made some plans for after both my kids turned 18 and all. But I ended up screwing up my back and I don’t think I would be able to go through college now.

It was a fun dream though.

What I want to be now

Now, I want to be a writer. Wait… I am a writer. I want to be a well-paid writer. Erma Bombeck is my idol for writing. 

Photo credit: Leukos. via Foter.com / CC BY-NC-ND

My goal is to publish one Erma Bombeck style book before I die. I should work on that.

So, what’s taking you so long? Self doubt. I am my own worse critic. I am the only thing holding me back. Admitting that doesn’t make it easier to do either. For right now, I am sharpening my writing skills.

I also have spent my off time getting all of my poems into a book. I decided to really take my time on it and get it how I want it – then I will publish it as my first book. I will work from there.

What do you want to be when you grow up?